Finding solace
by aeval
Summary: C.J deals with the fact the leak was caused by Toby, by turning to a friend. C.J/Kate
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: I own nothing. Seriously, i bairly own the computer I typed this on.

Summery: C.J deals with the fact the leak was caused by Toby, by turning to a friend. F/F if your not into that stop reading now.

Authors note: Upon re-watching West Wing I've decided that I really love Kate/C.J, thus this story was written. Please review if you'd like.

"I just....I just need to forget...Just tonight." She pleaded, breaking her normal stoic and ironic disposition. "I need to forget tonight. Just give me that." She paced, back and forth, back and forth across the room. Angst and betrayal aggravating her normally graceful movements.

Kate's eyes fixated on the chief of staff as she continues to rack up mileage. "C.J." the blond sighed, removing herself from the perch astride the desk to face the taller woman.

"Please." C.J whispered; her voice unabashedly raw with despair. her mirky green eyes glanced up to meet you're own. "Please." closing the gap between their bodies, enveloping arms. C.J's face buries into the smaller woman's neck allowing her to feel the tears soaking into her skin.

"Let's get out of here. Ok?" She suggest, feeling C.J nod against her body. Kate hesitantly pull away from her warmth, as flip open your mobile phone. "Andy? Its Commander Harper, I need you to send Ms. Cregg's car to the west entry. Thank you." as she spoke, C.J had grabbed her belongings and slid onto her coat. "Ready?" C.J nodded, as Kate stepped closer to her and wrapped a scarf around the taller woman's neck. The duo exited the West Wing in the shadow of two men dressed in black and entered into C.J's nondescript black sedan. Each woman clinging to each side of the car. Once arriving at C.J's apartment, they entered awkwardly.

"Do...Do you want anything?" C.J asked, as she removed her jacket and hung it up, allowing Kate to do the same. The blond shook her head as she removed her own coat. "Have you talked to Babish? Since...you know."

"No. My review of the leak will be used as evidence." You say, following her into the simply decorated living room. You sit next to her on the couch, her darkened hair nodded in agreement.

"You're military, how much trouble is he in?" C.J questioned, feigning ignorance of the severity of Toby's situation.

"We can't talk about this, C.J." Kate replied in her characterless calm voice. C.J leaned back against the black couch closing her eyes and giving off a loaded sigh.

"I know." Her eye's fluttered back open, catching Kate looking at her. "Thank you for taking me home, Kate." She turns to look at the blond, studying her face. Nothing is said, C.J reaches her hand across and grazes a paler one before pulling away quickly. "We should check the wires to see if the stories broken yet." Kate nods, still feeling the tingling running up your skin from the touch. C.J turned on the news, and pivoted her body closer to smaller woman. Several moments into the top of the hour report, warmth grazes her body as the NSA wraps her arms tentatively around the taller woman. For a moment both women stiff and full of nerves that accompany the progression of a relationship. Remaining through the rest of the news cast intertwined, the smell of C.J's hair and subtle perfume will be remembered over the news of the day in the mind of the young NSA. C.J relaxes in Her embrace, running her fingers over the palm of the smaller hand.

The news suddenly switched to some obscure commentary show, which caused both women to jump proving neither was actually paying attention to the aforementioned programme. C.J reached and muted the screen before turning to face the younger women. Green eyes locked with brown "Stay with me, tonight." She whispered. Kate nodded, fearing words would not work if she tried to reply. Kate decided that she couldn't wait any-longer and lean up and gently lay a kiss against her lips before pulling away. The blond shyly closed her eyes hoping to spare herself from embarrassment if it turned out she had misinterpreted the situation. A stifled laugh as all could be heard as the taller woman's lips descended once again onto Kate's, her hand coming up to cup the soft cheek. Kate tilts her head to deepen the kiss, tentatively parting her lips and coaxing C.J to do the same. After some time, she pulls away and kisses her cheek leaning into your ear. "I would have never pegged your for shy, Commander."

"Don't tell anyone." she joked, as she pulls her down to kiss her once again. Longer legs part astride the other woman's thighs, Kate reaches up and grasps her hips and pulls C.J closer to her body. All possible coherent thoughts are lost as C.J lips dart to the paler neck finding a spot that cause's the blond to shudder "God." she whispers as her hands pull up the blouse of taller woman to find the smooth, warm skin underneath. C.J gasps slightly, allowing Kate to take control and suck her bottom lip in-between her teeth. Gasping, C.J rakes her fingers through silky blond hair before pulling away.

Kate groans in disappointment when she removes herself from her lap. The taller woman just smiles as she takes her hand and pulls you both towards what Kate could only hope was her bedroom. Once inside, Kate wraps her arms around her from behind kissing the exposed neck as she unbutton her blouse. C.J rolls her head back as she reaches the swell of her breasts popping the last button open. Using her strength to her advantage, Kate turns her quickly so she is facing you. C.J smiles as she looks directly into Kate's eyes; Moving her hands to her own collar she slowly pulls off her blouse casting it to the floor. Kate's eyes roamed over the newly exposed skin of the woman she admired, responding to C.J's advance Kate reached up pulling her down to kiss her.

C.J moaned as warm hands grazed her sides, causing her to break out in goose-bumps. She pushed down the blonds suit jacket, disbanding it to the floor then quickly removed the tank top that she wore under it. Kate's fingers traced the line of the taller woman's skirt, tugging the zipper at the side. After a few tries the NSA was beginning to get frustrated, as she pulled away from the kiss to focus on the Zipper.

"They let you have a gun and code-word clearance?" C.J smirked as she began an assault of the blonds neck once again. Kate's eyes rolled back into her head.

"Distracting...me." She gasped as teeth raked against her pulse point. C.J backed away and pushed the zipper down dropping the skirt to the floor. Thanking the Gods that she had take her pantyhose off earlier in the night, she stood informant of the blond in only black silk. "You are amazingly beautiful."

C.J leaned in kissing the breath away from the smaller woman, pulling her hand and bringing her to the bed. Pushing Kate down on her back, C.J climbed next to her unbuttoning her pants and tossing them to the floor...

................................................................................................................................................

"Beep. Beep. Beep." a rouge blackberry blared out of the pile of discarded clothing. C.J opened her eyes, and rolled over to look at the blond face down in her bed. She pushed the long hair off Kate's pale shoulder, noticing faint discoloured marks spanning across her back.

"Kate." C.J whispered, as she ran her fingers down her exposed spine. Kate stiffened and jerked away at her touch. "Sorry." C.J downcast her head, misunderstanding the response.

"God. C.J." Kate stated as she shot up "Sorry, I'm awkward when waking up." Kate smiled as she kissed the taller woman's cheek before jumping up and grabbing her blackberry. C.J laid back watching the toned blond scanned the tiny screen, totally naked.

"Anything important?" C.J questioned, as she glanced at her watch. 4:32am. Kate shook her head.

"No." Kate replied, setting her phone on the night-side table before crawling back next to C.J. "One of my guys is doing briefs for Vinnick and evidently he's freaking them out." Kate lay into the open arms of the taller woman, pulling the covers up to her chest.

"That's never good." C.J laughed, into her hair. "Why are you covering up I know your all CIA an such, but this is taking undercover to a new level."

"Shush." Kate stated.

"Make me." C.J quipped, as she raised her eyebrow. Kate pinned the older woman underneath her, keeping their hands intertwined above C.J's head kissing her. Kate mounted the writhing woman underneath her as the fought for dominance. Then the incessant beeping of the blackberry went off again. Kate groaned as she let up on C.J's hands and reach back and grabbed the phone. Whilst Kate was distracted, C.J took the opportunity to flip the blond on her back.

"Damnit." The Blond swore, as she was suddenly flipped. "C.J!"

"I win." She smiled. "We need to get to work, don't we?"

"Yes." Kate replied before she kissed the other woman.

(Continue???)


	2. Chapter 2

"Sir, Don't worry about the U.N Delegation to Sudan. I'm working on it with NSA and we will brief you as soon as we have any idea what we might be looking at." C.J stated as she closed her briefing book, looking up at the President. "Will, dodge the press about the U.N situation with Sudan until Commander Harper Briefs you later."

"Sure." Will agrees, as he stands up and leaves the room. "Thank you, Sir."

"Is he going to be able to handle the Press, Claudia Jean?" The President questions as he watches Will leave the Oval Office, returning behind his desk.

C.J stood up and stood in-front of the Desk "He'll be shark chum for a few days. No one will be asking about anything other than the Leak, so if he can find 1,000 different ways to say 'no comment' he'll be fine."

"Mr. President." Debbie announces as she enters the Oval Office, "Commander Harper and Nancy McNally." The president nods, as Debbie ushers in the NSA and her blond Deputy. C.J turns around at the mention of the woman who shared her bed the night before. Kate walks in behind her boss crossing to stand in-front of the desk. She catches C.J's eye and gives her a slight smiles before snapping into her military demeanor.

"Good morning, Sir." Nancy proclaimed, handing him a file folder with the day's NSC briefing. "Kazakhstan's President is worried about the recent movement by the Chinese."

C.J noticed the time on her wrist watch, "Excuse me, Sir. I have that call with the Prime Minister of Germany." C.J made sure to steal a glance at Kate before she retreated into her office.

[6 Hours Later]

C.J sat behind her desk head buried in a large pile of papers, whilst some head of state rambled on the speaker phone. A slight tapping was heard over the Senator, causing her to snap her head up to see her Strange, yet efficient Secretary. "Commander Harper for you." C.J nodded her head, as Margaret moved aside to let the blond in closing the door behind her. Kate smiled as she went to sit on the couch, putting down the two cups of coffee she held.

"One Minute." C.J mouthed to Kate who nodded. "Senator Tillman; I will take into consideration what you said, but we will not be commenting about our investigation. I will have someone from Council's office get back to you." With that C.J hung up. "Just Kill me?"

"Calls about Toby?" Kate questioned, as she watched C.J walk over to where she sat. C.J nodded, ungracefully plopping down next to her. "I brought coffee." She stated, as she handed her the cup that was intricately labeled with personalized flavor components. "The good stuff, the kind you need to go out and get."

"I do not understand the concept of 'go out'." C.J joked, as she gratefully took the cup offered to her, "You mean to tell me, you can leave this building?" Kate nodded, as she took a sip. "Wow."

"What?" Kate cocked her eye brown at the exhausted looking brunette.

"How do you know how I like my coffee? Margaret can't even get it right."

"Code-word clearance." She stated with a stone faced look. "I thought we went over that last night." Kate smirked, causing C.J to blush into her coffee cup. "So."

"So." C.J stammered, knowing they had to talk about what was happening between them. "Last night...Last night was."

"Yea." Kate smiled, taking a sip once again. "C.J we don't have to talk about it. I mean, We can just forget if that's what you want. I'm good at keeping secret's. It's what I used to do for a living." Kate looked down at her hands, before C.J forced her to pivot her head to look at her.

"I don't want that." She leaned in and kissed her softly. "By the way; I like you're hair down by the way."

Kate pulled her hair to the side to reveal the reason for her uncharacteristic loosened hair. "Someone left a mark on me, and I did not need the whole Situation room knowing I had sex last night." Kate glared at C.J who was busting out in giggles.

"Sorry." C.J attempted to look apologetic, as she ran her thumb over the slight discoloration on halfway down her neck.

"No, your not." Kate pouted. "We should talk about last night."

"Yes. Kate; I like you, allot." the taller woman sighed "I have since you stood up to the guys during the Gaza situation. I think your brilliant, strong willed, and sexy as hell." She took Kate's hand and intertwined their fingers.

"why didn't you say something earlier?" Kate questioned, tilting her had to the side, running her thumb over the other woman's hand.

"Nerves? Fear of rejection? Plus, I did not know where you stood."

"Where I stood?"

"In reference to Women. I was scared with getting promoted that reporters would start nosing around in my lifestyle."

"I understand." Kate stated, as she kissed C.J's hand. "That's how I was in the Navy, always watching my back. Luckily, the CIA doesn't care about sexuality; alas when your undercover its not really the best climate to attempt a relationship. Can I ask you a question?"

"Anything." The older woman smiled.

"Why now? We've worked tougher since Gaza, why now?" The blond said in a hushed tone, letting her vulnerability show through.

"When I talked to Babish." C.J sighed "He kept asking about you; about our friendship. I was scared that he'd accuse you or me of the leak and I'd never have a chance to...I don't know." Kate pushed the hair that had fallen in C.J's eyes behind her ear before Margaret knocked at the door forcing the pair apart.

"You have a meeting, now." the redhead stated, leaving quickly feeling the tension in the room.

"Can I see you again Tonight?" Kate whispered, as C.J nodded her head. Leaning in to kiss her deeply before she replies "I'll be done, hopefully at 11:30."

......................................................................................................................................................

"Margaret!" C.J hollered, as she rose from her desk. "Where is the damned China Report; Hutchinson was going to get it to me by 11:00pm and its now.." She checks her watch "11:45, and I want to get home!"

"He..." Margaret started, "He called." She was interrupted again "C.J!" She caught the rambling Chief of Staff's attention.

"What?" C.J stopped.

"He said that the report was canceled because the reporting NSA had to go to Pakistan."

"What? How do I not know there is a situation in Pakistan."

"It's not really my place to say. I have a message for you from Commander Harper." Margaret said as she handed her an envelope. C.J took it and sighed as she sat into her desk chair. She unsealed the envelope and opened the note.

_C.J_

_I'm sorry I did not have a chance to see you before I had to leave. We had an Issue in Pakistan and Hutchinson decided to send me. I swear that man hates me. Anyway, I'm gonna be in Pakistan for a few days. I'm sorry, I was really looking forward to seeing you tonight. Hopefully we can figure out something for when I get back to D.C. _

_K.H_

C.J folded the letter in half and slid it into her purse. It was going to be a long few days.


	3. Chapter 3

_(Thanks to everyone who's reviewing this story. This is a second take on this chapter the first draft i wrote got lost in my flash drive. Hopefully this one's aright. )_

_Knock...Knock....KNOCK_

"I swear to god, I will kill you with my bare hands. It's 3:30am!" C.J grumpily exclaimed as she flung open her front door revealing her secret service officer.

"Sorry to wake you ma'am." The suit moved aside to reveal a very tired looking Commander Harper. "Commander Harper to see you." C.J nodded as she ushered Kate into her home closing the door behind her.

"Kate." C.J whispered, as she removed the younger woman's coat hanging it on the rack aside the door. "Did you just get back?"

The blond nodded "Can we go to sleep?" her voice pleaded. C.J took her hand leading her into the bedroom. Kate sat on the side of the bed with C.J in-front of her. C.J leaned in and unbuttoned the Grey dress shirt that the smaller woman wore removing it from her body and discarding it on the floor. She unhooked the leather holster that held Kate's gun from her chest moving it to hang on her closet. She knelt down and slipped off the her shoes then leaning up and unbuttoning her slacks pulling them off her legs. C.J stood up and smiled at the woman sitting on her bed the intimate moment not being lost on ether of them.

"Lay back." C.J whispered, as the commander followed her request. She pulled her covers over the smaller body before she climbed in next to her.

......................................................................................................................................................

_Later that morning_

Kate awoke and bolted upright not recognizing the room she was in. She looked around and saw a set of pyjamas folded on the end of the bed along with a towel, smiling at the care that C.J took in picking her out clothing. She got up and walked into the bathroom to shower.

C.J was sitting on her sofa looking over various newspapers, sipping her coffee when Kate entered from the bedroom wearing her clothing; Long flannel pants with a white v-neck t-shirt that fit Kate just right. C.J looked up and smiled as she entered the room.

"Good Morning,"

"I haven't slept that well in forever." Kate exclaimed as she sat down next to C.J. "Or that long."

"5 hours does amazing things." C.J smiled "Want some coffee?"

"Do you have Tea?" Kate questioned, receiving a quirked eyebrow from her highly caffeinated lover.

"Yes. Somewhere." she said as she rooted around the drawers finding a box. "Do you not...drink...coffee?" C.J asked trying to understand how someone could function with out caffeine.

"I do not." Kate chuckled, watching C.J trying to come to terms with this realization. "It's better to not be hyped on caffeine when handing guns and such." She smiles as she takes the mug from C.J's hands.

"So." C.J started as she sat down next to Kate. "How was Pakistan?"

"Rainy." Kate replied, laughing when C.J rolled her eyes. "It went fine. Everything is settled."

"Vague much?" C.J replied.

"Sorry, C.J. Hutchinson needed me to go smooth things over with a friend of mine who works with some of the Rebels on the Indian Boarder."

"Sounds dangerous." C.J said with a hint of worry. Kate turned to look at her.

"Not at all. Darab is a great guy; he takes these kids what could very easily go and become martyrs and teaches them how to protect themselves and their families and they're country. It's quite amazing."

"Wow. I had no idea this kinda thing was going on." C.J smiled as she noticed the pure excitement on Kate's face when she was talking about it. "Do you miss it?"

"Miss what?"

"The excitement of the CIA. Working undercover, being all secret agenty?"

"Sometimes. But, I like what I'm doing now."

"Good to know; We'd hate to have to find another NSA."

"Good to know my Resume keeps me around!" Kate laughed as she leans in a kisses C.J. C.J wrapped her arms around the smaller woman's neck, lacing her fingers through the still damp blond hair.

"I think I could use you for things other than your resume." C.J pushed the smaller woman back against the couch kissing her breathless.

......................................................................................................................................................

_A short time later:_

Kate and C.J lay on the floor wrapped up in each-others arms when the phone rang. "I swear." C.J sighed as she grabbed her blackberry from the table, Kate rolled over onto her stomach.

"C.J Cregg." she answered as she watched Kate, studying the other woman's form and memorizing every inch of her. "Yes, Ma'am. No Problem, Ma'am." C.J moved closer to Kate, gently running her nails up and down Kate's spine causing her to break out in goose-bumps. "Of course ma'am, I'll move whatever meetings the President needs to take and I'll handle everything else. Tell him to feel better Ma'am and I'll stop by sometime tomorrow. Thank you Ma'am"

"Mrs. Bartlett?" Kate asked as C.J set down her phone. C.J nodded, moving to stratal Kate's body. C.J moved her hands up her sides, beginning to gently massage the pale skin.

"Yes. The President is evidently under the weather and Abbey does not want him to take any meetings tomorrow." She leans down and kisses her bare shoulder, letting her lips run across the raised scar on her skin. "So, We're going to have to handle everything tomorrow." C.J leaned back onto her calves when Kate, turned her upper body to see her.

"You have lots of scars." C.J pointed out, running her finger on a prominate one on her side.

"Yes, Yes I do."

"Why? What Happened?"

"Nothing."

"Kate."

"C.J"

"Were you held captive when you we're in the CIA?"

"Yes."

"Where?"

"Overseas." Kate curtly replied as she pulled away from C.J's body. She began to redress.

"Stop it." C.J replied, as she too threw on her clothing.

"Stop what, seriously C.J you have to understand." Kate said standing up.

"Why won't you tell me. You're not in the CIA anymore, You're not undercover, You're not some where _overseas_. Just talk to me." C.J responded curtly, saying overseas in a very patronizing way.

"I CAN'T, why don't you understand that?" Kate grumbled, storming into C.J's room grabbing her clothing. She changed back into her slacks leaving the Berkley shirt on shoving her wallet in her pocket and holding her gun holster. She re-enters the living room to see C.J standing in the centre. "I'm gonna go home."

"Kate..." C.J started as she stepped closer to the blond.

"I'm going to go home. I will see you tomorrow, ok?" With that Kate left. C.J watched as the door closed pretty much in her face.

"Dammit." C.J swore, sitting down on the couch wondering how it went from amazing sex to being pissed at each-other in 20 minutes. C.J could not understand why Kate had gotten so angry when she asked about the marks, all she knew from Kate's blacked out FBI file was that she was one of the youngest graduates of Annapolis that she was highly regarded in the Navy, that she spoke several languages, and she worked in the CIA for several years. Nothing was ever insinuated about the nature of the work, or the location's. "What happened to you overseas?" C.J questioned to no one in particular.


	4. Chapter 4

Kate walked through the entrance of the West Wing pulling her bag higher on her shoulder as she slid her badge through the scanner.

"Thanks Steve." She gave the older man a slight smile; as she continued her route to her office praying to whomever was listening that she wouldn't have to face C.J until at she was on her turf in the Situation room.

"Commander Harper." a voice called out to her, as she arrived at the stairs, she pivoted on her heels looking for the voice that called out to her.

"lieutenant Bailey." She replied, enjoying the presence of another enlisted person. "You know you should have joined the Navy. Air Force sucks."

"I get seasick." He quipped, as she walked closer to her.

"Ok, well; it's for the best then." She smiles, "What can I do for you?"

"I was wondering if you'd be able to get someone to brief the Vice President about..... American Military policy...you know Globally...and such."

"And Such..." She squinted her eyes "'Well what exactly are you looking for?"

"He gets tripped up on some of the finer things. Some of the lesser known issues and what not."

Will continued to rattle off several disturbingly obvious things every vice president should know, Kate noticed a certain tall, brunette walk down the hall towards them.

"Sure, Will. Whatever the NSC can do to help, send a message down to my office and I'll find some time." C.J strode up to them as Kate finished her sentence.

"Morning." Will chirped at C.J, "Thank you, Commander." He winked.

C.J got an awkward look on her face. "Did Will just wink at you?" Kate nodded with an equally odd look on. "Strange. Anyway, I would like your help on...you know Issues of state."

Kate nodded, following C.J as they returned to her office. "What did Will want?" C.J questioned as they walked.

The blond couldn't help but hear the tinge of jealously in C.J's voice "He wants the NSC to hand hold the V.P through foreign policy."

"He wants YOU to hand hold the V.P. Aren't you like... WAY over qualified for that?" C.J joked as she pushed the office door open, closing it after Kate entered.

"Little bit. Seriously, He was talking about things anyone who's been reading the Post for several days."

"That bad?" C.J asked, as Kate nodded. "Frightening. Anyway, what do you know about Uzbekistan."

"You mean Kazakhstan?"

"Do I?"

"Yes. Anyway. Kazakhstan is having China/Russia issues. The new president has ties to the Soviet Union and the parliament just agreed for China to bid on an multibillion dollar oil pipeline."

"That sounds like it could get bad." C.J replies with an air of stating the obvious.

"Yea. You should be having a briefing book coming your way." Kate added, looking towards the floor. "Was that all?"

"Kate." C.J sighed, sitting down on her couch watching as Kate remained propped against the desk. "I'm...I'm sorry about last night."

"It's fine." Kate whispered.

"It's not. I'm sorry." C.J stood up and crossed the room to stand closer to her. "I was wrong to judge you. I just want to get to know you." she looked up and caught the green eyes of the woman in front of her. "I'm sorry."

"Me too. I'm not used to trusting people." Kate sighed, as she looked into C.J's eyes. "I want to trust you."

"You can." C.J smiled pushing a strand of hair behind the blonds ear. Enjoying the intimate moment was short lived when Margaret knocked on the door, forcing the women to move away from each-other.

"You have a meeting." The redhead stated, when C.J nodded her head she left leaving the door open.

"Come over tonight." Kate asked her, before she left.

"To your place?" Kate nodded at the question. "Ok."

"Ok." Kate smiled as she retreated out of the room.

-----------------------------

Several weeks later. (Post Ellie's wedding)

"Ok, I have no idea what's going on." C.J complained, as she furrowed her eyebrows trying to follow the plot line coming to climax informant of her.

"It's your basic good vs. bad...Normal vs. outsiders movie. What are you not following."

"Why does the guy with the intense sideburns..."

"Wolverine."

"OK. Why is he fighting the guy with the stupid hat?"

"Magneto is the guy with the stupid hat. Magneto is the bad guy. He does nothing but cause trouble."

"I thought the girl with the red hair was good. She was good in the other movies you made me watch."

"Made you watch? and yes she was good, and if you we're paying attention and not trying to distract me in the beginning you would have seen that she has an alternate personality disorder type thing."

"Have you always been this much of a geek?"

"Yes. I grew up on Navy Ships....Not too much TV, but crap loads of comic books." Kate smiled, as she intertwined their fingers. "So the whole gang's in town... You ready to see them?"

"Yes and no. Josh won't stop hounding me about the election and getting the president to do an appearance." C.J rolls her eyes, as Kate turns off the movie. "It will be good to see Leo and Donna though. It will be like old times, except Toby wont be there."

"Yea. So the Presidents chilli?" Kate was curious about this get tougher.

"Yea, its pretty lethal. As long as you have something to wash it down with you should survive."

"Good. So, question."

"Yes, Ms. Harper?" C.J replied in her best press secretary impression

"How are we to act at this little get tougher. I mean, I know we said we wouldn't say anything until we leave office....But..."

"I've been thinking about that too, Kate." C.J sighed, pulling the smaller woman to rest back against her chest, wrapping her arms around her. "I can't lie."

"Your ears get red..."

"I know. Donna will know that something is up." she continued, "I don't think I'm ready to tell everyone outright. Can we just be us and see what happens?"

"Sure." Kate replied, as she pulled C.J's arms tighter around her. "We should get ready to go." C.J nodded as they stood up off of the couch. Kate pulling C.J's hand as they walked to the shower.

_45 minutes later_

Kate infrount of her bedroom mirror carefully applying scant amounts of makeup to her alabaster skin. She returned to the bed where her outfit was laid out, picking up the black suit pants and sliding them up her legs as a hair dryer ceased its echo through the apartment. Kate slid her belt through the loops of her pants buckling it as C.J entered the room.

"You look good." C.J smiled, as she took in the appearance of long blond hair over naked shoulders.

"Not dressed yet." Kate stated as she grabbed a white tank top out of her dresser sliding it over her head and tucking it into her slacks. "Anyway, you look amazing." She smiled as she came behind C.J as she put of her earrings. C.J wore a fitted burgundy skirted suit with a pale yellow blouse underneath.

"Thanks you." her eyes fluttering as Kate lay light kisses up the span of her neck. C.J moaned softly, turning to capture the blonds lips in a searing kiss. "Kate...We.. need to go." Kate pulled away grabbing her crisp white button down off the hanger sliding it over her shoulders and closing the buttons.

"Lets go." Kate smiled, as the headed for the door sliding on respective pumps and sling-backs as they passed the door. Kate threw on her suit jacket as they walked to the car flanked my secret service. The entered the residence following the sounds of laughter as they came closer to the gathering. "Tougher or separate?"

"Come on." C.J smiled as they entered the room of there peer and friends.

"C.J." Donna exclaimed, as she came up and hugged the equally as tall woman. "How are you, it's been way to long!"

"I'm great, how are you? You look tired." C.J replied, as her eye glancing locked on Kate as she talked to Leo.

"I am. The Campaign has been long, but we're doing well. The Congressmen is great and we're getting there." Donna beamed as she poured a glass of white wine. "You look great...Happy."

"I am." C.J smiled, taking a sip of her own drink.

"C.J. Are you ignoring my calls for a reason?" Josh exclaimed as he scampered towards the women.

"Yes." C.J replied, deadpanned. "Margaret is on strict rules."

"Come on, C.J the President needs to get behind the Congressmen and start showing the love on the campaign!"

"Wait a minute there Skippy, the President has you know the Country to run so pardon us if we can't drop everything and jump at the chance to chase your candidate around the country."

Josh smiled, and looked her up and down. "Damn C.J, you look really good."

"Why thank you, Joshua. Now go and pester Sam."

"Whose the guy?" Donna bluntly asked, catching her off guard.

"No guy." C.J said with all honesty, when Donna gave her a look "Seriously, no guy." She tried everything she could not to break out into a blush, when Kate walked up and butted in.

"Hey Donna...C.J" Kate smiled at them, knowing she was interrupting.

"Hey." Donna replied, keeping her eyes probing at C.J. "Donna, Josh seems to be tunnel focused right now, but can you tell him that the NSC is going to set up a meeting with the Congressmen and the Senator about China and Kazakhstan?"

"Of course, ill make sure he makes the time." Kate replied, standing a little too close to C.J then friendship allows.

"Friends!" The president boomed over everyone, causing a sudden snap to attention. "I'm pleased to see all of your faces. It's been a long road we've been on tougher, and I'm relieved to say it's almost over. Unless the Josh pulls off getting the Congressmen elected, then it's their long road. I'd like to thank you all for coming and spending some of your little free time with me tonight. Now..go mingle and enjoy each-other's company."

"Here." Kate whispered as she handed C.J another glass of wine, their fingers grazing over each-other a second longer then intended. "Excuse me, I'm going to go talk to Will for a moment." Kate spoke as she sauntered away, C.J eyes trained on the back of her.

"Claudia Jean Cregg!" Donna exclaimed as she re-caputed the other women's attention. C.J alerted with her eyes open frighteningly wide. "You and Kate?"

"What...Wait...what." she stammered, as Donna grabbed her arm and pulled her over to the side of the room.

"Kate Harper." Donna enchanted, "Commander Kate Harper, US Navy Deputy National Security Advisor."

"I know her title." C.J smiled. "You can't say anything." Donna nodded. "We've been seeing each-other for a while now."

"Awe!" Donna gleamed, pulling C.J into a hug. "I'm so happy for you both!'

"Thanks Donna." C.J reliped "Can we stop making a scene now?"

"Oh of course yes." She smiled. "Lets go mingle."


	5. Chapter 5

(Pretend that this happened AFTER the leak. That Leo went to Cuba and such. I rewatched this episode and decided it fit nicely.)

"Can I have a minute?" C.J questioned as she walked astride the Deputy NSA out of the Situation room.

"Sure." Kate replied, stopping in the corridor of the situation room. "I need to make a phone call in my office, but I should be done in about 10 minutes. Is that ok?"

"Yes, just come up to my office when your done." the taller women added, turning on her heels and leaving the fiercely guarded room. Kate briskly returned to her office. Unlike the majority of people who worked in the whitehouse, her office was as undefinable as they come. Standard issue desk with a high-tech, high security desktop computer; nothing defined personality in the room, no pictures of family or friends, no trinkets from places she's been stationed, nothing. Kate picked up her phone dialing a number that was far too familiar.

She walked straight to CJ's office and sat opposite her.

_"I'm walking back in here thinking, "This is a building I never thought I'd be in"_

CJ looked at her and saw a vulnerable side to the blonde she rarely got to see, _"Maybe it's a place you never get quite used to."_

_"Once, my dad was gone with the Pacific Fleet. My mother and I were left at the Key West Naval Base. There was no housing, so for a while we lived in this boiling trailer with no air conditioning. The wind shook it at night and rocked me to sleep. It's a long way from here."_

_"Kate, what's going on?"_ CJ asked with concern.

_"Tomorrow, Cuban-American factions are going public with Leo's visit to Cuba."_

"Where did you get this?" C.J questioned, leaning forward in her chair.

"A friend." Kate sighed, trying not to relive her conversation with Andy. "Someone I worked with when I was down there."

"Are you ok? Kate, what's wrong."

"Remembering."

"You know you can talk to me...about anything."

"What do you know?" Kate cocked her eyebrow at her implication of knowledge. She could tell something was different about there friendship, like a veil was removed. "C.J"

"I got your File." She stated, looking down at her lap.

a hushed 'Oh' escaped from Kate's lips. "Anything interesting?" she joked.

"Yes...well know. It's blacked out. I just know you were in Africa, Kosovo, Iran and of course of communist pick of the day; Cuba."

"Yea. I got around in the last 90's. I finished at Annapolis and got chosen for CIA right out of it. I was posted in Africa after I finished training in 1994." She began to unravel the story...

"you worked in Rwanda." C.J gasped slightly, watching the other woman. Kate nodded, pushing her hair out of her eyes.

"Yes. I was a part of a small team that went undercover during the genocide. I was there for about a year; then I got moved to Cuba to watch the American's who kept trying to interfere with our actions. Cuba was out hub for all of our Latin American stratagem. at the time. My head officer; who also happens to be my 1st husband lead the operation for the region."

"How long we're you there for?" C.J asked, trying to gage an emotion of the stoic blonds face.

"4 years."

"How long we're you married?" she asked trying to picture Kate being married.

"Being a Spy, was not so conducive to being married. Neither was the fact he like to get drunk and mistake me for a punching bag." Kate tried to joke off, before she felt C.J's hand grasp hers giving her the strength to continue. "Dressing up and disappearing into characters and scenes made living allot easier to deal with. I was married to him when he was killed."

"How?" was the only thing C.J could manage to croak out, she was still shaken how such a strong woman could be a victim of domestic abuse.

"Beaten with a baseball bat, on assignment one night." Kate sighed. "My local informant, who was my friend down there knew what was going on. It didn't take a genius to figure it out; Miguel hired a thug, I'm almost 100% sure of it. Of course the CIA made some story about one of the gang's we were holding's retaliation."

"Oh my god. Kate." C.J exclaimed, holding her hand tighter trying not to be off put by the fact her girlfriend held people captive.

"It's fine. It was shortly after the run in with Leo that he died and I was sent back to the Pentagon to recover. Then they sent me to Kosovo to monitor the civil war and help Nato."

"How long we're you there?"

"Maybe 8 weeks; I got an urgent message from my friend in Pakistan; who I went to see." the blond began, her face moulding into a slight grimace. "Anyway, at that time I couldn't just be flown into Pakistan so I had to go by convoy from Tehran to the Pakistani boarder."

"Kate you're file says you were in Iran from 1999 until 2003." C.J said in confusion. Kate looked up into C.J's blue eyes not sure if she wanted to reveal the most important secret she had. The one the military covered up, the one very few people knew about.

"I was held C.J. For 154 weeks, I was held."

"Kate."

"C.J i've never told anyone other than my debriefed what happened to me."

"You don't have to tell me."

"I need to." Kate forced herself to look into C.J's eyes, seeing the tears welling up in the beautiful blue orbs. "the jeep was stopped by rebels. Their was three of us who we're taken. Our driver, an Iranian was killed for betrayal."

"Where we're you kept."

"They had a training camp in the mountains they took us to. A hundred or so boys high on whatever drug they had lying around learning to be Martyrs. We we're kept about 600 meters away from the edge of camp tied with our arms above our heads with wire." Kate began subconsciencly running her fingers over her callused wrists. "They'd take us down to beat us or try to get information out of us."

"The tortured you." C.J whispered, taking Kate's hand back between her own.

"Yes. Luckily they are really bad it it." this caused C.J to let out a small laugh. "They thought hitting me with a whip would crack me, pathetic." Kate smiled. "Anyway, yes. that's why I have those marks on my back. We we're rescued in 2003 and rehabilitated. My other captures left the CIA and I went back to being Kate Harper; the Navy promoted me and I started working at the DOD."

C.J nodded, knowing how much it took for the younger woman to bare her secrets. "What about family? Where are they?"

"I was the perfect CIA choice. Only child of poor parents. My dad was Navy and he followed him around until my mom left us when i was 11 and my dad had a stroke when I was 15. I've been on my own since."

"My mom died when I was 15 too, and your not on your own anymore."

"C.J." Kate smiled, pushing a strand of hair out of C.J's eyes.

"and if anyone ever hurts you again, i swear i'll" Kate silenced her with a kiss. C.J tangled her fingers in the other woman's hair pouring all the emotions that she felt into it. "I'm falling in love with you, Kate."

"I've already fallen." the blond replied.

--End--


End file.
